Imagine having AT&T at your mercy

AT&T logo on Boston store
Credit: Nick Barber

Have you ever fantasized about giving a major carrier a taste of its own medicine? A group of professionals gathered on Reddit’s section devoted to networking did so over the weekend and their resulting handiwork is a hoot.

Background: Verizon Wireless is already on this one fellow’s campus in a big way and AT&T wants to up its game there, hopefully with help from the customer. From the initial Reddit user’s telling of the tale:

DigitalDeity: “They're asking us if we have switch ports available for them to plug into, that we can VLAN back to one of their routers that they'll put in one of our closets. LOL NO? I'm not really prepared to become a service provider for AT&T's cellular network.”

Neekz0r: “Wait, what? That's worrying that someone at AT&T thought that would be a good idea. On the other hand, you should take them up on it, actually. Tell them it's unlimited and then give them a 250Mb datacap and it's a $2/Mb after that.”

DigitalDeity: “And after they reach the cap, it's throttled down to EDGE speeds, with traffic shaping and captive portals every 5 minutes, with slipstreamed advertisements for Verizon Wireless?”

Sproon: “And then add a monthly increase 150% for usage in a really beautiful contract you wrote up that has a monthly fee and states they'll be on a low priority thread unless they want to pay more a month.”

Port53: “Don't forget to make them buy their equipment through you, and don't reduce the monthly fee after it's been paid off.”

Voxnemo: “And you have to have an arbitration clause that requires them to use your best friend as an arbitrator, on the island of Fiji, and they have to pay all travel cost - including yours.”

Lawschoolzombie: “In business class.”

Now that was fun.

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