You might think the Better Business Bureau would have better business to attend to than trying to protect gullible Internet video watchers from the most preposterous fakeries perpetrated by viral marketers.

You'd be wrong.

You might also believe that four ringing cell phones can emit enough radiation to pop popcorn, in which case you'll be heartened to learn that the BBB has your back.

The National Advertising Division (NAD) of the Council of Better Business Bureaus said in a press release: "Advertising claims made in the context of viral videos produced to build interest in a product are subject to the same standards of truth and accuracy as advertisements published in traditional media."

The videos in question -- there were different versions showing phones purportedly popping popcorn -- caused quite a snap, crackle and pop when they made the rounds this summer, despite being quickly revealed as fakes.

End of story, right? Well, apparently NAD concluded that this commercial ruse warranted an "inquiry." And even though that inquiry was cut short by the fact that the advertiser stopped using the videos, there was an "opportunity offered by its review to provide guidance of principles that apply to advertising in nontraditional media."

Now it's worth noting that NAD's judgment and the BBB's truth-in-advertising guidelines are just that, guidelines, initiated as part of a campaign designed to "foster truth and accuracy in national advertising through voluntary self-regulation." (Insert laugh track here.)

And while few would argue that there shouldn't be standards of some kind, even in the make-believe world of advertising, we're talking about popping popcorn with cell phones here. Does anyone raise a stink when advertising videos show equally implausible situations such as flying automobiles or gorgeous women fawning over pot-bellied bar flies?

The press release concludes this way: "In nontraditional media, to the extent that advertising claims are communicated, advertisers are required to substantiate those claims with competent and reliable scientific evidence."

On the Internet? Good luck with that one.

Recalling the indignity of being FMP'd

A recent column about corporate leaders tap-dancing around the word layoff hit uncomfortably close to home for a number of readers. Henry Farkas, a senior Unix administrator for a Connecticut-based health insurance behemoth, sends along these thoughts: