You don't know tech: The InfoWorld news quiz

iPhones slow on the upload, Justin Bieber hits the road

Last week the blogosphere was up in arms over the iPhone 4's spotty reception; this week it was all about the phone's slow uploads. (Some people just aren't happy unless they've got something to complain about.) In other non-Apple news: Twitter has a new advertising service, Facebook has a Germany problem, YouTube is making it easier to turn your brain into mush, and this just in: Chuck Norris is not Justin Bieber's dad, despite the uncanny resemblance. Are you paying close attention to today's tech headlines? Prove it by acing this quiz. Correct answers are worth 10 points. Now get going.

1. Uh-oh, there's more trouble in Apple paradise. Some users are reporting dialup-like speeds when uploading files from their iPhone 4s. What's causing the slowdown?

a. A secret AT&T cap on uploadsb. More Apple antenna problemsc. A software defectd. They're holding the phone wrong

2. Upon investigation, we were stunned to find that the formula we use to calculate how many bars of signal strength to display is totally wrong. Our formula, in many instances, mistakenly displays 2 more bars than it should for a given signal strength. For example, we sometimes display 4 bars when we should be displaying as few as 2 bars. ... Their big drop in bars is because their high bars were never real in the first place." Who's got more fictional bars in more real places?

a. AT&T

b. Sprint

c. Apple

d. Verizon

3. Twitter is rolling out a new ad service that alerts followers to special offers from select merchants. What's it called?

a. @tweetdeals

b. @bluebirdspecials

c. @earlybird

d. @buybuybirdie

4. Internet pranksters 4chan are at it again. What did they do this time?

a. Send Justin Bieber to North Korea

b. Redirect Justin Bieber's YouTube videos to porn sites

c. Spread a rumor that Bieber is dead

d. All of the above

5. The first living celebrity just passed the 10 million fan mark on Facebook. Who achieved the momentous deed?

a. Barack Obama

b. Chuck Norris

c. Lady Gaga

d. Justin Bieber

6. YouTube has unveiled a new feature designed to make watching Web videos "effortless." What's it called?

a. Leanback

b. Laydown

c. Loungeabout

d. Comatime

7. "The Internet's completely over. ... [It's] like MTV. At one time MTV was hip and suddenly it became outdated. Anyway, all these computers and digital gadgets are no good. They just fill your head with numbers and that can't be good for you." Who says the Net is yesterday's news?

a. Prince

b. Justin Bieber

c. Lady Gaga

d. Chuck Norris

8. An experimental solar-powered aircraft just completed a 24-hour flight without burning a single drop of fuel. What's the name of this perpetual flying machine?

a. Sun Air

b. Solar Impulse

c. Swiss Breeze

d. iPlane

9. Facebook is getting sued by German regulators. What did the world's largest social network allegedly do now?

a. Stored names and email addresses of non-Facebook users

b. Allowed pro-Nazi groups to create fan pages

c. Hoovered up data from open Wi-Fi networks

d. Rooted against Germany in the World Cup

10. Take the number of Pirate Bay users hackers claim to have exposed and divide by the number of iTunes accounts Apple says a rogue app developer managed to illegally access. Add the amount Woot.com is attempting to charge the Associated Press for the use of its blog content. Put that in your playlist and hit Shuffle. What do you get?

a. 1,001.75

b. 10,017.5

c. 100,017.5

d. 1,000,017.5

ANSWER KEY

Question 1: Uh-oh, there's more trouble in Apple paradise. Some users are reporting dialup-like speeds when uploading files from their iPhone 4s. What's causing the slowdown?

Correct Answer: A software defect

Earlier this week, iPhone 4 users were complaining of upload speeds well under 100Kbps, causing many to accuse AT&T of throttling their uploads. According to AT&T, the slowdown affects less than 2 percent of its 85 million wireless customers and is caused by a flaw in software used by its Alcatel-Lucent 3G hardware. We're still waiting for Alcatel-Lucent to point the blame at someone else. We're voting for BP.

Question 2: "Upon investigation, we were stunned to find that the formula we use to calculate how many bars of signal strength to display is totally wrong. Our formula, in many instances, mistakenly displays 2 more bars than it should for a given signal strength. For example, we sometimes display 4 bars when we should be displaying as few as 2 bars. ... Their big drop in bars is because their high bars were never real in the first place." Who's got more fictional bars in more real places?

Correct Answer: Apple

In a letter to customers posted on its site late last week, Apple officially explained the mysterious bug that caused iPhone 4 handsets to drop calls when held in a certain way was really a problem with how the phone displays signal strength. In other words, if your calls are being dropped, blame AT&T. Proving that while Apple may not be skilled at passing the bars, it's excellent at passing the buck.

Question 3: Twitter is rolling out a new ad service that alerts followers to special offers from select merchants. What's it called?

Correct Answer: @earlybird

The service is designed to use the real-time nature of Twitter to alert followers to special, limited-time offers from various merchants. Or as the Twitter blog puts it: "Every couple days, our Earlybird at Twitter HQ lays a golden egg. Inside this wondrous egg is a piece of parchment with the day's magical deal." Apparently they don't get out very often over there at Twitter.

Question 4: Internet pranksters 4chan are at it again. What did they do this time?

Correct Answer: All of the above

The Net's most notorious pranksters apparently commandeered a contest on the official Justin Bieber My World website that polled true Beliebers asking where the 16-year-old heartthrob should tour next. At the contest's end North Korea had won, gathering nearly 660,000 votes. Last weekend YouTube was hit with a cross-scripting hack that popped up a message that Bieber is dead, then redirected users to porn sites, which was similarly blamed on the 4channers. For the record, Bieber also issued tweets denying that he is a member of a cult, his mother was asked to pose nude for Playboy, and that his father is Chuck Norris. We're not buying that last one; Chuck Norris is everyone's father.

Question 5: The first living celebrity just passed the 10 million fan mark on Facebook. Who achieved the momentous deed?

Correct Answer: Lady Gaga

The curiously coiffed disco diva zoomed past 10 million Facebook fans last weekend, putting her ahead of the President and behind only the late Michael Jackson in the realm of social media fandom. Of course, Chuck Norris could have 500 million Facebook fans if he really wanted to. He just doesn't roll like that.

Question 6: YouTube has unveiled a new feature designed to make watching Web videos "effortless." What's it called?

Correct Answer: Leanback

Leanback aims to make using YouTube as easy and as brain dead as watching TV by creating a continuous stream of high-definition full-screen videos from your feed -- a move designed to make the service more living-room friendly. Because why should couch potatoes be denied the joy of endlessly watching the Numa Numa Dance, Star Wars Kid, and Chocolate Rain?

Question 7: "The Internet's completely over. ... [It's] like MTV. At one time MTV was hip and suddenly it became outdated. Anyway, all these computers and digital gadgets are no good. They just fill your head with numbers and that can't be good for you." Who says the Net is yesterday's news?

Correct Answer: Prince

The artist once again known as Prince made these statements in an interview with the U.K.'s Daily Mirror, which is distributing his latest record "20TEN" free with this Saturday's edition -- presumably on one of those no-good digital CD gadgets.

Question 8: An experimental solar-powered aircraft just completed a 24-hour flight without burning a single drop of fuel. What's the name of this perpetual flying machine?

Correct Answer: Solar Impulse

The Swiss-based craft reached an altitude of some 28,000 feet and stayed aloft through the night, thanks to the 12,000 solar cells on its wings and its banks of lithium-ion batteries. The only flaw? The flight lasted longer than the pilot's iPod battery. Seriously.

Question 9: Facebook is getting sued by German regulators. What did the world's largest social network allegedly do now?

Correct Answer: Stored names and email addresses of non-Facebook users

The Hamburg Commissioner for Data Protection and Freedom of Information is in Facebook's grill for a feature that allows users to upload their personal contacts to their Facebook account and invite others to join them. The service stores this information about non-Facebook users without their permission, which violates German law. Facebook has until Aug. 11 to make a good case for its data storage policies, change its ways, or pay a fine. While they're at it, maybe they can get Mark Zuckerberg to stop wearing that damned hoodie.

Question 10: Take the number of Pirate Bay users hackers claim to have exposed and divide by the number of iTunes accounts Apple says a rogue app developer managed to illegally access. Add the amount Woot.com is attempting to charge the Associated Press for the use of its blog content. Put that in your playlist and hit Shuffle. What do you get?

Correct Answer: 10,017.5

Argentinian hackers claim to have accessed the names and email addresses of some 4 million Pirate Bay users, according to the Washington Post's Brian Krebs. Apple says developer Thuat Nguyen and his apps were booted from the iTunes store after he allegedly hacked into 400 accounts and used them to make fraudulent purchases of his own software. In a lighthearted commentary on the AP's strict no-free-quoting policies, Woot is billing the AP $17.50 for lifting information directly from the Woot blog when reporting on the e-commerce site's $110 million acquisition by Amazon (the AP disputes the charges). So 4M / 400 + 17.50 = 10,017.5. In this case, it appears AP stands for "ain't payin'." Come back next week for another unquotable quiz.

This story, "You don't know tech: The InfoWorld news quiz" was originally published by InfoWorld.

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