You don't know tech: The InfoWorld news quiz

HP's Mark Hurd gets canned; Google and Verizon come up with a plan

Two big events rocked the tech world this week: Mark Hurd's abrupt resignation as CEO of Hewlett-Packard due to a sex scandal, and Google and Verizon's plan to neutralize the Net (or at least the parts they don't care that much about). But that's not all: Microsoft launched yet another anti-Apple campaign, Apple may be introducing a living room device that runs iPhone apps, a JetBlue flight attendant turned into an instant Internet celebrity, and Tetris crowned its first world champion. Are you feeling lucky on this Friday the 13th? Prove it by acing our quiz. Each correct answer is worth 10 points. Now cross your fingers, toss some salt over your shoulder, and get started.

1. Mark Hurd is no longer CEO at HP. Which marketing contractor's sexual harassment suit led to his downfall?

a. Jodie Fisherb. Jodie Fosterc. Jodie Powelld. Jodie Mitchell

2. Turns out Mark's would-be paramour was also a part-time actress. Which of the following is NOT of one of the films on her IMDB resume?

a. Intimate Obsession

b. Sheer Passion

c. Dangerous Liaisions

d. Age of Love

3. Google and Verizon have teamed up on their own version of a "free and open internet." Which of the following is NOT part of their proposal?

a. Equal access to all Web sites

b. Full FCC oversight of the Internet

c. Transparency on the part of broadband providers

d. The same rules apply to wired and wireless Internet

4. Apple has long stopped running its "I'm a Mac" commercials, but Microsoft isn't done fighting yet. It's launched yet another "PC vs. Mac" Web site. Which of the following is NOT one of the claims Microsoft is pushing?

a. Macs don't let you choose

b. Macs can take time to learn

c. Macs might spoil your fun

d. Macs are less secure

5. It wouldn't be a week in tech without some kind of Apple rumor. Word on the street is that Apple will be reintroducing its new(ish) video streaming device next month. What's the alleged new name?

a. iTube

b. iStream

c. iTV

d. iDiot

6. The classic arcade game Tetris has crowned its first world champion. Who's the planet's best at fitting geometric shapes into geometrically shaped holes?

a. Alexey Pajitnov

b. Henk Rogers

c. Jonas Neubauer

d. Adam Cornelius

7. "It wouldn't be fair for us to point out absurdities in other corners of the industry without acknowledging when it's about us. Well, this week's news certainly falls into that category. ... While we can't discuss the details of what is an ongoing investigation, plenty of others have already formed opinions on the matter. Like, the entire Internet." Who has the InterWebs been talking about, according to this blog post?

a. JetBlue stew Steven Slater

b. Admin assistant Elyse "Jenny" Porterfield

c. Mortgage officer Jonas Neubauer

d. HP marketing consultant Jodie Fisher

8. In another job-related Net meme this week, a woman known only as "Whiteboard Jenny" allegedly quit her job as an admin assistant via dry-erase board. Which Web site perpetrated this hoax?

a. The Dive

b. The Chive

c. The Hive

d. The Jive

9. Can your cell phone help you get lucky? Yes, according to a study by online dating site OK Cupid. Which smartphone platform leads to more sex, according to OKC?

a. iPhone

b. Blackberry

c. Android

d. Windows Mobile

10. Take the amount ousted Mark Hurd will pocket in severance pay for leaving HP, and divide by the in-contract cost of Dell's Android-powered Streak tablet. Multiply by the record number of fixes Microsoft released on patch Tuesday this week. Put that inside your golden parachute and pull the ripcord. What do you get?

a. 569,333.33

b. 5,693,333.33

c. 569,333,333.33

d. 5,693,333,333.33

ANSWER KEY

Question 1: Mark Hurd is no longer CEO at HP. Which marketing contractor's sexual harassment suit led to his downfall?

Correct Answer: Jodie Fisher

Hurd resigned after Fisher filed sexual harassment charges against the now-former CEO, which allegedly turned up evidence of falsified expense reports and other ethical infractions. However, questions about HP's real motives in booting Hurd remain. And we bet you thought running HP was as exciting as watching grass grow. Wrong again.

Question 2: Turns out Mark's would-be paramour was also a part-time actress. Which of the following is NOT of one of the films on her IMDB resume?

Correct Answer: Dangerous Liaisions

Aside from soft-core stuff and reality TV shows, Jodie Codie-Foster also appeared in Easy Rider: The Ride Back (2009) and the "Star Trek: Starfleet Academy" video game (1997). Which, apparently, were the perfect qualifications for doing client meet-and-greets at up to $10,000 per gig. If that's the HP way, where do we sign up?

Question 3: Google and Verizon have teamed up on their own version of a "free and open internet." Which of the following is NOT part of their proposal?

Correct Answer: The same rules apply to wired and wireless Internet

Google's Eric Schmidt and Verizon's Ivan Seidenberg collaborated on their proposed set of rules, which call for open access and non-discrimination of data on the wired Internet, but exempt wireless data services as being too wet-behind-the-ears for government regulation. Because as we all know, poor defenseless companies like AT&T and Verizon can barely handle their own against the big bad FCC.

Question 4: Apple has long stopped running its "I'm a Mac" commercials, but Microsoft isn't done fighting yet. It's launched yet another "PC vs. Mac" Web site. Which of the following is NOT one of the claims Microsoft is pushing?

Correct Answer: Macs are less secure

Microsoft launched its latest salvo in the 26-year-old Windows vs. Mac wars earlier this week with a Web site designed to help people choose between a Windows 7 PC and a Mac. We'll summarize it for you: Choose Windows 7 PCs because they're what you're used to. Any more questions?

Question 5: It wouldn't be a week in tech without some kind of Apple rumor. Word on the street is that Apple will be reintroducing its new(ish) video streaming device next month. What's the alleged new name?

Correct Answer: iTV

Really, what else would they call it? According to Engadget, Apple will unveil a new $99 box running the iPhone operating system and stream HD (but not 1080p) video content to the living rooms of Apple fan boys, along with the ability to run iPhone apps. Apple is also allegedly planning another "special event" in September where it will foist iTV and other wonders upon the world. Will the rumors prove true? Tune in next month to find out (but only in 720p or less).

Question 6: The classic arcade game Tetris has crowned its first world champion. Who's the planet's best at fitting geometric shapes into geometrically shaped holes?

Correct Answer: Jonas Neubauer

The 29-year-old mortgage loan coordinator topped hundreds of other competitors in the first Class World Tetris Championship held in Los Angeles last weekend. The game was invented more than 25 years ago by Alexey Pajitnov, and first licensed for Nintendo in 1984 by video game entrepreneur Henk Rogers. The tournament will be featured in a documentary about Tetris currently being made by director Adam Cornelius. And you now know more about Tetris than anyone except Alexey, Henk, and Adam.

Question 7: "It wouldn't be fair for us to point out absurdities in other corners of the industry without acknowledging when it's about us. Well, this week's news certainly falls into that category. ... While we can't discuss the details of what is an ongoing investigation, plenty of others have already formed opinions on the matter. Like, the entire Internet." Who has the InterWebs been talking about, according to this blog post?

Correct Answer: JetBlue stew Steven Slater

The now-former flight attendant became an instant Internet folk hero this week after he cursed out a passenger on the plane's PA system, grabbed two beers, and slide down an escape chute onto the tarmac at JFK. JetBlue obliquely acknowledged the incident on its blog while avoiding any substantive comment about it. We're 98 percent sure somebody's working on a reality TV show about the incident right now.

Question 8: In another job-related Net meme this week, a woman known only as "Whiteboard Jenny" allegedly quit her job as an admin assistant via dry-erase board. Which Web site perpetrated this hoax?

Correct Answer: The Chive

One day after Steve Slater made headlines via his now classic take-this-job-and-stow-it-completely-under-the-seat-in-front-of-you routine, pictures of "Jenny" submitting her resignation via whiteboard (and slagging on her boss as a sexist, Farmville-addicted pig) raged across the Net. The woman in question was in fact an actress named Elyse Porterfield, hired by The Chive's owners, John and Leo Resig. Before it was revealed as a hoax, "Jenny" garnered more than 350,000 fans on Facebook, got her story picked up by major media outlets, and received invites to appear on Leno and "Good Morning America." Next we'll learn that Mark Hurd gal pal Jodie Fisher was also hired by the Resigs.

Question 9: Can your cell phone help you get lucky? Yes, according to a study by online dating site OK Cupid. Which smartphone platform leads to more sex, according to OKC?

Correct Answer: iPhone

Apparently this is one thing about the iPhone that doesn't vary depending on how you hold it. On average, Apple iPhone users reported more sex partners before age 30 (10 for men, 12.3 for women) than Blackberry (8.1 and 8.8, respectively) or Android (6 and 6.1). Windows Mobile was not included in the survey, possibly because people who carry WinMo phones are usually still virgins.

Question 10: Take the amount ousted Mark Hurd will pocket in severance pay for leaving HP, and divide by the in-contract cost of Dell's Android-powered Streak tablet. Multiply by the record number of fixes Microsoft released on patch Tuesday this week. Put that inside your golden parachute and pull the ripcord. What do you get?

Correct Answer: 569,333,333.33

Hurd will walk away with $12.2 million in severance, plus another $16 million in stock options. Dell's long-awaited Streak will go on sale next week for $300 with a two-year contract with AT&T ($549 without the contract). Microsoft issued a record breaking 14 patches this week, swatting 34 bugs in Windows, Office, Internet Explorer, and other Microsoft apps. So 12.2M / 300 * 14 = 569333.33. If Hurd got paid $12 million for not sexually harassing an HP marketing babe, what do you suppose he'd have gotten for actually doing it? Come back next for another scandalous quiz.

This story, "You don't know tech: The InfoWorld news quiz" was originally published by InfoWorld.

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