Top 10 Apple iPhone 4 Press Conference Responses and Why Microsoft Is To Blame

A "bumper" case and hardware fix in new phones are most likely what's in today's announcement, but lets have a little fun making up some other crazy possibilities.

Here's a tongue-in-cheek look at the top 10 possible announcements Apple will make at today's iPhone 4 press conference. 1. A $29.99 “bumper” case available in August will solve the antenna problem. 2. The “bumper” case will be given free to all customers. 3. iPhone 4 purchasers will be given a $30 credit for the Apple store or iTunes. 4. The IOS 4.0.1 patch fixed all the problems. 5. This was due to user error – customers were touching End (hang up) when they believed they touched Call. 6. This was all due to crude oil fumes released by the BP oil spill into the ionosphere. 7. Bill Gates finally released his botnet upon the iPhone, injecting nefarious code into IOS 4. 8. The iPhone 4 mistakenly shipped with early beta Windows 7 Mobile code downloaded by an Apple summer intern and linked into IOS 4. 9. Apple's releasing all of their "I'm A Mac" Windows Vista attack ads on iTunes, Blu-Ray and DVD. 10. Because of the large iPhone market penetration, Steve Jobs mistakenly believed the iPhone no longer needed an antenna because users would simply join hands and create one worldwide human antenna. Bonus #11: The iPhone 4's problems are a perfect example of why Apple will never allow Adobe Flash on the iPhone. Okay, my best guess is really that Apple will announce a hardware fix in all new iPhone 4's for the antenna problem, the IOS 4.0.1. patch fixed the signal strength display, and all current iPhone 4 owners are eligible to receive a free "bumper" case. Thanks for letting me have a little fun with today's press conference.

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