It turns out most every technology 'is like crack'

You thought techno-addiction was limited to the crackberry and video games?

What is it about technology that makes it not only addictive but so addictive as to be "like crack?" The question occurred while I was editing a story in which an industry analyst said: "Virtualization is like crack and people go crazy with it - for a while."

Recognizing hyperbole when I see it, I presumed that he meant virtualization is like virtual crack, but point taken -- again. This time, though, I felt compelled to do some research to see exactly how many different technologies are like crack. Turns out there are so many that the search itself became like ... well, let's just say it was hard to stop cold turkey. Examples:

"Programming is like crack," it says here, although you haven't hit bottom until you're hopped up on object-oriented programming. That stuff's "really like crack for these people."

"Blogging is like crack for academics."

The Blackberry is so much like crack, of course, that the word crackberry is in the dictionary and pulls up more than 1 million returns on your standard Google search.

If you've ever wondered -- not that you should have -- here is why "Ev-Do is like crack."

The porn industry has long received credit -- too much, probably -- for spurring technological advances, so no one will be surprised to learn that cybersex is "the crack cocaine of sex addiction."

But for gosh sakes, even the caps lock key on your keyboard can be "like crack" IN THE WRONG HANDS.

There is no end to the list of Internet sites that are like crack, no doubt in part because "bandwidth is like crack; once consumers try a little, they have to have more." ... Do you have that bandwidth monkey on your back? C'mon, you're among friends.

"E-Bay is like crack to sellers," which I suppose would make e-Bay buyers like crack dealers, even though that seems bass-ackwards.

Wikipedia is like crack that anyone can edit.

"Facebook is virtual crack for the 21st Century," it says here.

"Color is like crack" -- color? -- it is on Flickr.

"Hulu is crack, iTunes is marijuana," which makes iTunes a gateway drug, I suppose.

Yes, there is even a Web site named "Just Like Crack."

A cell phone "is like having crack in my pocket, and every time it vibrates or rings it is like crack goes into my body and I have to answer it no matter if it is a text or a call it must be done." Techno-crack will make you babble like a crack-head.

A lot of parents already know this, but for those who don't: "Xbox is crack for kids."

In fact, so many "video games are like crack" -- especially World of Warcraft -- that I cannot for the life of me explain why we bought our kids a Wii this past Christmas (which, not to get sidetracked from technology, is a holiday that is also like crack).

Everybody knows "Twitter is like crack." (Of course, it was founded by a guy named Biz Stone and stones are rocks and crack comes in rocks. Coincidence?)

Even simple "e-mail is like crack for marketers."

Oh, why futz around: When you get right down to it, "the Internet is like crack, only worse." Crack flowing through a series of tubes.

Even blog-statistics provider pMetrics is like crack, "but not in the prostitutes selling their bodies for a fix, possessing more than five grams gets you ten years in the pokey sort of way." That the writer felt compelled to make that distinction speaks volumes.

Researchers ask: "Electronic gaming machines: Are they the 'crack-cocaine' of gambling?" It's one of those questions that answer themselves.

But the machines are nothing. "Online gambling is called the crack cocaine of creating new addicted gamblers," says this professor. Must be so.

Bottom line: There's really no way a geek can escape crack's clutches. "Technology is like crack. First you get a taste of the good stuff ... then you really pay."

Don't say I didn't warn you.

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