Hackistan’s president has identity theft on the brain at Black Hat security event
President of fictional Hackistan talks up identity theft at Black Hat security event.
LAS VEGAS — Ever hear of the nation of Hackistan? I hadn’t until I met the president of Hackistan, who happened to be manning a booth at the Black Hat conference here Wednesday. He showed me on a map how Hackistan borders North Sloberia, East Sloberia and the Alpha Zone. The prez was kind enough to grant an interview to explain the important international role his country now plays in identity theft, hacking networks and phishing.
So what’s your name?
President Bogdan.
Do you have a first name?
That’s all, Bogdan. Like “prince.”
How many people live in Hackistan?
Thirty million people, but only 200 with legal identities. We stole the rest obviously.
How big is the economy?
Our Gross National Product is 38 US dollars but illegal is $630 billion.
So tell me about your government.
Zorkuldonia is the capital. My upload to power was simple. I stole the identity of my predecessor.
So what kind of networks do you have in Hackistan, landline or wireless?
We have the opportunity to steal many networks from surrounding countries. We don’t have our own networks.
So why are you at Black Hat, President Bogdan?
To warn the people not to use Fortify. If they don’t stop using Fortify, when they Look at Netflix and order “Sopranos,” I’ll send them MacGyver DVDs. You see my sister, Roja, she is like logic bombshell.
So where is Hackistan, somewhere in the Caucasus Mountains?
Somewhere like that.
How did the people of Hackistan get so good at identity theft and bots?
We teach it in school. A lot of people, they want to emigrate here, and we’ll give you a Social Security number, somebody else’s. I’ll save you a space.
[President Bodgan is enthusiastically played by actor Joel Dovev, sponsored by Fortify.]
